I don’t think we have a true notion of how our identity needs to shift when we make a change until we get into the change.
Furthermore, we tend to get into change initiatives from where we are now. Our old selves.
There are rare instances where we can completely cut off everyone who knew us before, dramatically change environments, and comprehensively forget our entire past.
Even if we manage to successfully abandon the people and the environment, the scars from the past still linger. Old behavior, beliefs, and decision-making processes still surface (barring a major brain-health crisis).
I think we can take advantage of our inclination to “system-design our way to change.”
The adjustment I would make is to add a consideration of who we want to BE at the end of the process.
How does our identity need to shift for us to be successful?
What changes do we need to make to our beliefs?
The valley of change is where the lessons of identity occur.
As you practice, is the identity you need to adopt to be successful with this change fulfilling?
Are you finding yourself knocking up against a deep-seated value that you do not want to let go of?
Are you becoming someone you would be proud to be? Is the identity change an improvement?
How are your relationships with others? What is changing around you as you take this journey? Are those changes helpful or harmful?
“Faking it till ya make it” has some value. It allows you to test a new identity. It allows you to experience a new way of being and seeing whether it truly fits.
One word of warning: There’s a thin line between “faking it till ya make it” and being inauthentic.
I’ve found it helpful to be clear about the changes I am trying to make (to the best of my ability) and recruit supporters (when I can).
If it is a change that requires some stealth – action over words.
People will figure it out eventually and make their decision.